My Writing

12 January, 2020

Brainnnsssss...

Ontario Power Generation issued (evidently in error) an alert message at the semi-unghodly hour of 7:24 on this Sunday morning, to the effect there had been some sort of ... INCIDENT ... at the massive Pickering Nuclear Power Plant (just east of Toronto) early today.*

Maybe.

A couple of hours after the initial message, the alert was more or less retracted: it had, we were now told, been sent out in error. Yeah, right. Who are you going to believe, Ontario Power Generation or Patrick Nielsen Hayden?†

Lorna and I were discussing the situation over breakfast when I realized what very well might be the horrible truth: amongst our favourite dishes are cervelles au buerre noir (calves' brains, lightly breaded and fried and then served with browned butter) and beyin salatası  (Turkish cold-brains salad).

Could the reason we aren't hiding under our bed today be because we have somehow become... naaahhh.

*The emergency alert seems almost to have been calculated to maximize fear and concern while minimizing efficiency and information transfer. Lorna tells me the French-language version of the message was if anything even less coherent and useful.

†Ignore the fact PNH's tweet was issued more than 30 minutes before the warning-that-wasn't alert. There is nothing to see here. MOVE ON.

2 comments:

Keith Soltys said...

The communication of the alert and the retraction were a classic example of how not to do it. As you know, I live about a klick of the plant and I found out about the alert when I got a FaceBook message from a niece in Sault Ste. Marie. (I got the actual alert text about five minutes later). I never did get the retraction, although Nancy did.

Somebody needs to update their process documentation.

I do wonder what effect this has had on the value of my house.

Michael Skeet said...

Lorna says the government issued 32,000 potassium iodide tablets in the two days following the screw-up. How not to do it indeed.